Saturday, November 19, 2011

I have hurt people in my life. And people have hurt me. You have, too, and they have you; only many don't care to admit that.



I remember a day long ago, early in my mothering career, when my eldest child had broken some boundary, who knows what, and had needed a talking to. I recall her outrage, her temper - not so unlike my own outrage and tempers, actually. I had waited for her to calm down, waited until I heard the padding of little feet cross the floor to the kitchen, waited to hear what she would say or see what she would do.

Mothering was new to me, and I was discovering what it meant to be on the other side of rebuke, to be on the receiving end of an apology. I hope to never forget the way she looked at me and wrapped her arms around my neck; her perfectly vulnerable willingness to trust me was overwhelming.

What do you say to a child who is asking you to forgive her? How do you reassure her that you do? Our hands wrapped together as on a whim I led her to the trash can, throat choking with the emotion of a lifetime, unaware that at that very moment I had taken myself by the hand and was leading me to forgiveness.

"Here, I forgive you with all my heart. Now let's put the whole thing in the trash can and forget about it. Ok?"

A mirrored smile. And a phrase neither of us would ever forget.

Thank God that bin is so big.

17 comments:

Pam said...

Mothering may have been new to you but the tender caring way you Mothered her speaks volumes about your instinct to Mother in a gracious and loving way, Allison.

your words just blow me away, my friend..
Amen

Out on the prairie said...

I love the remarkable find.

TexWisGirl said...

gosh, this was sweet. and touching. and raw. :)

From Beyond My Kitchen Window said...

What a loving and truly kind moment. I think being a mother is a hard but rewarding job.

Kate @ Daffodils said...

Beautiful post. I am still learning about those moments myself!

Randy said...

Excellent post!

Randy said...

Excellent post!

Annette said...

What a beautiful, honest story you have shared. It's full of truth and it touched me deeply. Thanks for the post.

Debbie said...

What an amazing mom you are! I love the way you made it real for her - throwing it away in the trash bin. Oh how I wish I could throw my mistakes away instead of reliving them day after day. You have given your dear one a true gift.
Love you,
Debbie

Ola said...

I am sure you are good mother!
I fully agree with what you wrote at the beginning of this post

Κωστής Τζαγκαράκης said...

....Your post today so sensitive and loving...!!
Thank you for bringing to me again memories almost forgotten.
Costas

Inger said...

You are such a good mom, so loving.

MarmePurl said...

L.O.V.E that story. Or should I call it a parable? A good lesson is always welcomed.

Pete said...

such true words and perfect photo to go with it

Nancy @ A Rural Journal said...

Just wow. A profound thought for this American Thanksgiving week. Big hugs, my friend. xoxo

Dawn said...

My bin has to be the biggest and most full.
Mothering is tricky business...as are relationships.
sigh sigh

Raindrops and Daisies said...

My bin is pretty big too!

Lovely post Allison.

Wishing you and your family well.

x Fiona