Saturday, July 23, 2011

Longfellow writes:

"In character, in manner, in style, in all things, the supreme excellence is simplicity."



After months of knowing I would eventually need to find a way to slow down, my body finally did that for me. I was in the ER, closed-in behind cream-colored curtains for hours, trying to maintain the collected and pleasant calm I usually assume whenever I approach a medical facility. Only this time I was not there for one of my children, and the arms they were poking were mine.

There came this moment when I called my husband on the cell phone and whispered across the line... "get me the hell out of here".

The doctors came in and stared at me, concern foremost on their faces. It actually touched me to see their gentleness, and I tried to force myself to submit. "I want to go home now. I will forgo the medication. No, I don't want that, please. I want to go home...now. I need to take care of my children."

Really? I watched as they considered that coming from a woman who could not stand up.

What do women do who are stuck in those places for months at a time? What can possibly keep them from going insane? The day after I began to feel better, I awoke and betook myself to the balcony wrapped in blankets. I let my eyes scan the valley and drink in the beauty of the outdoors. The light; the leaves clapping their tiny hands; the birds singing. The simplicity of the outdoors seemed to me the loveliest thing I'd ever seen. And I sat, enjoying the silence, for hours.

And then I read:

In the beginning was the Word. And the Word was with God - and the Word was God.

Before the pain and before the sadness, was God. Who made all things for our eyes. Who made all this magnificent simplicity for me.

16 comments:

texwisgirl said...

i am SO glad you are doing better. what a bad couple of weeks you've had, dearie...

i loved the leaves clapping their tiny hands... just pure joy...

Marissa ♥ said...

Oh Allison!
I'm glad you are home now. I hope you are feeling better.

I have that verse marked in my Bible. I love your thoughts there...

Your photo is lovely, as always.
(Hugs)

Dawn said...

That verse is powerful...and I'm glad it held you up when you needed it the absolute most.

We can get to that extreme point...it's easy enough to do when we do what we do.
Glad you are home. Sorry you went through it.
I often wonder if that's how we get pulled back down to earth~~ while He reminds us He is already taking care of it all....
hugs dear friend.
xxoo

Meg said...

I had a hard enough time leaving my boys to go have another baby. I completely understand!

I think God uses these times to remind us who is in charge and of what He has given us. I'm so glad you are feeling better!

Liesl said...

A powerfull verse,will go mark it in my Bible. I hope you are feeling better Allisson,take care of yourself...we woman do what needs to be done,,it is how we simply have to handle things...((hugs))

Ola said...

hopefully you feel better now!!!

Out on the prairie said...

Never liked hospital existence.Nice to hear your voice and hope you are healing well.

Pam said...

My mother hen instincts were right.. and I pray you will grow stronger with each passing day.
Hold tight to those three glorious letters, he will carry you through whatever lies ahead.

Take care of #1 so you will be able to care for those that you love. You are the world to them!

be well and happy, Allison.

xoxo
Pam i am :)

Linda said...

Oh for the blue sweater in a time like this. There are no words big enough, only a sigh that goes to to the soles of my feet and a love that reaches across the ocean to sit nearby.

Randy said...

So happy that you are back with all of us who care about you. I would have been like you "When can I get out." I hate hospitals.

From Beyond My Kitchen Window said...

Oh Allison, I am so sorry to hear that you were in the hospital. I wish we were neighborsa, I could just run next door and check on you myself. Rest until you are well and don't try to rush it. That is my motherly advice for you today.

Pam said...

I just reread your words again..
Allison, I sincerely hope you realize what a penchant you posses for writing your thoughts so eloquently.
I believe there's a journal of thoughts in you that I would pay to read.

be happy n health.. all else will follow

Kim said...

So glad you stopped by the Red Farmhouse. Just looked at pages and pages of your blog ~ so lovely. I'll be back often.
Praying for a speedy and complete recovery for you.

Changes in the wind said...

Why is it that we work so hard, journey so far and the answer was there all along. Hope you feel better soon.

Southern Lady said...

Oh Allison, I am so sorry that you have been under the weather. I am so glad that you are home now. Please promise me that you will take plenty of time to sit on your balcony and enjoy the silence more often. My thoughts and prayers are with you, my friend. Carla

Trisha said...

WHAT? You were in the hospital??? I hope you are feeling much better & happy to hear your home now. HUGE HUG & rest rest rest!!